Part I: Perfectionism Strikes!
Perfectionism can be used to better oneself and to support reaching the full potential of an individual; yet it can also be used in a detrimental sense, causing harm to an individual's self-esteem or sense of self, thus pushing an individual to negative outcomes. In general, perfectionism is seen to be pressuring oneself to be up to par in every aspect such as a report card on accomplishments or looks (Psychology Today). It can be seen in a healthy sense of helping one feel self-motivated and push them to be resilient and obtain success, yet it can also be seen in an unhealthy sense by holding such strong pressures of meeting high expectations (Psychology Today). Though perfectionism is not considered a mental illness, when taken to extremes, this personality trait can be harmful to the individual itself.
As seen in Psychology Today, perfectionists are described as individuals who can be quick to find fault and be overly critical of mistakes. They look for approval and validation yet have such strong and high expectations that approval and validation is hard for them to see and notice. Perfectionists also tend to struggle with accepting compliments and celebrating their success as theirs. Typical signs of perfection include:
Fear of failure
Feelings of unworthiness
Low self-esteem
Adverse childhood experiences
Frequently, these signs of perfectionism are also paired with mental illness such as depression, anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder, eating disorders and suicidal impulses (Psychology Today).
Perfection also may come with negative outcomes such as:
Procrastination
Tendency to avoid challenges
Rigid all-or-nothing thinking
Toxic comparisons
Lack of creativity
According to Curran and Hill (2019), perfectionism is described in three different domains such as self-oriented, other oriented and socially-prescribed. The domains are much self explanatory as self-oriented puts a pressure on oneself to reach the unrealistic standards of perfection, while other-oriented focuses on putting pressure on others to reach perfection and lastly socially-prescribed describes wanting to be perceived by others as perfect. These types of perfectionism, if not coped with healthily, have lead individuals, especially young adults, to experience high levels of depression, anxiety and suicide ideation (Bergland, 2018).
In support of those statistics, it is also seen in this study that young adults have been greatly affected by perfectionism and its domains. Data shows that the increased use of social media have emphasized pressures young adults put upon themselves due to comparison (Bergland, 2018). As the generation continues with pressures from others such as unrealistic educational and professional expectations, perfectionism rises within the community.
Part II: Adaptive Perfectionism in the Drive for Self-Improvement
Adaptive perfectionism, or the state in which an individual holds themselves to high standards while simultaneously ensuring they keep their self-criticism “in check”, is preferable for the maintenance of mental health. While all perfectionists seek to do the utmost best they can in their day-to-day assignments/tasks, the level of self-criticism afforded to the self is what can be either self-destructive or self-fulfilling. The “adaptive” nature of the perfectionist are those aspects that are able to be changed and adapted to relatively easily to prevent succumbing to criticisms. Burnam et al. (2014) notes that adaptive perfectionists strive for the highest possible quality of work achievable in their view, and doing so instills in them a strong sense of pride for such an accomplishment; indeed, the researchers hold that this pride is beneficial to individuals’ mental health because it serves as a gratifying agent and is strong enough to overcome any negative self-evaluations that may arise in its absence. Therefore, any means to increase this level of pride through adaptive measures, such as improving time management, can become an efficient way to work toward making one’s perfectionism more adaptive. Further, the degradation of mental health from the adaptive to the maladaptive centers on the healthy separation of standards and criticisms. For the adaptive perfectionist, criticisms are kept low and as a result do not impede upon the achievement of high standards. By not allowing their personal doubts and self-criticisms to determine their sense of self-worth, this type of perfectionist does not resort to a more destructive and dreary worldview of failure reminiscent of catastrophism.
Next, there is notable evidence that demonstrates how adaptive perfectionism is beneficial for mental health. Burnam et al. (2014) found in their research on college students that adaptive aspects of perfectionism such as greater expectations in personal standards and organization were correlated with better academic abilities to manage time more efficiently and display fewer procrastination tendencies. These findings were significant because a more adaptive form of perfectionism proved that students were more motivated to do well in their academic pursuits and achieve success, all because they were much more efficient at staying organized and setting higher yet realistic standards to work toward. This indicates that having high standards that are not bogged down by high self-criticisms, where adaptive factors can be changed to fit the highest possible standards and weaken the tendency toward highly critical self-evaluations, does wonders for students to maintain their composure and not be plagued by fears over procrastination.
How is it that the adaptive perfectionist can create adaptive roles that maintain high standards while lowering self-criticisms? Singh (2021) offers some clarification in her meta-analysis of perfectionist studies. Firstly, Pryor from the Family Institute at Northwestern University finds that the adaptive perfectionist can be truly adaptive and therefore achieve a healthy state of mental health because they are capable of challenging themselves by setting high goals and standards at a realistic and reasonable level. In this way, failure is not truly feared because there is not a sense that the standards are unachievably difficult to attain. Yet in the face of failure, the adaptive perfectionist will not cower and subject themselves to a state of crisis. Instead, they will learn from their mistakes, readjust expectations if necessary, and continue to stay engaged in their tasks to ensure a proper successful conclusion. In her analysis, Singh (2021) also confirms the findings in Burnam et al. (2014)’s study. Namely, she also asserts that in the setting of achievable goals and standards, the adaptive perfectionist will be motivated to achieve positive feedback and be fueled by a sense of pleasure and pride from their efforts. This echoes the finding that adaptive perfectionist students were more motivated in working toward and proud of their achievements, as they are able to grow at a pace that they themselves see as reasonable.
Part III: Fear and Loathing in Maladaptive Perfectionism
Perfectionism is a double-edged sword, in which perfectionism has both positive and negative traits. However, there is a form of perfectionism which leads to detrimental results. This form of perfectionism is known as maladaptive perfectionism.
There is this salient connection between psychological afflictions and maladaptive perfectionism. As Dr. Travers of Psychology Today notes, there are two types of perfectionism: “striving” and “evaluative” perfectionism. For example, while a striving perfectionist would approach a task thinking they can do it well, an evaluative perfectionist would approach a task thinking that if they fail, no one will respect them. Maladaptive perfectionism thus falls on the “evaluative” perfectionist spectrum. An “evaluative” perfectionist would approach an issue with a self-critical frame of mind and base their need to be the best off how others will perceive them rather than a “striving” perfectionist frame of mind aimed towards trying their best at any task at hand.
Dr. Kurapov of Psychology4u defines maladaptive perfectionism as having inflated expectations for oneself which in turn correlates with higher likelihood of being self-critical. The insatiable desire for control is what characterizes maladaptive perfectionism, as everything must go as planned. In terms of social interaction, maladaptive perfectionists have turbulent social relationships. As control is a key defining factor of this form of perfectionism, maladaptive perfectionists perceive everything as a contest, in turn leading them to aggressive behavior. However, there is also this inner need for social validation as they seek positive feedback and approval from those around them.
Some indicators of maladaptive perfectionism are (Kurapov, n.d):
Procrastination
Maladaptive perfectionists strive to meet high standards which may be next to impossible to achieve, the constant worry to be perfect leads to delay in completing tasks due to this fear of not being perfect or “good enough.”
Avoidance of new experiences
Maladaptive perfectionists fear failure and despite possible learning opportunities, choose not to partake in new things out of fear they are not “good” at it.
Social situations leading to anxiety
Rather than experiencing life to the fullest, maladaptive perfectionists fear being perceived as a failure, as though not being good enough makes them undeserving of social acceptance.
Never disclosing internal feelings
Although all humans experience fear and doubt about their mistakes and inner turmoil, maladaptive perfectionists hide their feelings from others, such as worry. Their constant need for perfection leads to not revealing their flaws and in turn vulnerability.
The incapacity to have relationships long-term
Maladaptive perfectionists have not only intrapersonal conflict but also interpersonal conflict. It is their way or the highway, often wanting people who agree with them rather than those who critique them (even if constructively). Their need for constant control leads them to have a lack of true and genuine bonds.
Therefore, given the destructive outcomes that stem from maladaptive perfectionism, there are monumental consequences for mental health for those who are maladaptive perfectionists. There is a correlation with maladaptive perfectionism and depression as those who suffer from depression often also exhibit self-critical evaluations of themselves according to some studies (Kurapov, n.d). As such, if an individual is self-critical and in turn views their failing grade in a class as rendering them a failure, this poses pernicious outcomes for their mental health as their thoughts in turn define their worth as a person. Furthermore, there are also other mental health consequences such as anxiety and eating disorders along with emotional fluctuations and insecure attachment (Kurapov, n.d). Maladaptive perfection therefore does not only pose consequences for self-evaluation and self-concept but also has a strong negative impact on mental health, impacting wellness as a whole.
For the reasons presented, being a maladaptive perfectionist has unfortunate consequences for one’s mental health as maladaptive perfectionists constantly have their defenses up and have internalizing troubles.
Section IV: Outline and explain the therapy and self-help strategies that can help the individual work toward adaptive or positive perfectionism.
There are many self-help strategies that can help the individual work toward positive perfectionism. While said strategies are available for all individuals who seek a healthy balance between expectations and criticisms, they are most beneficial for maladaptive perfectionists who are trailing toward the opposite, more pernicious path of mental health decline. Northwestern University’s Family Institute (2019) has provided the following guidelines to combat negativity in the quest for excellence:
Break goals down into smaller sizes: it can be overwhelming when you have a big goal. When you break it down into smaller goals that lead up to the big goal, it can seem less overwhelming and stressful. This can also make it seem more manageable.
As stated prior, the healthy perfectionist will only attempt to challenge themselves to feats that are not impossibly out of reach, which is due to their individual assessments of what is achievable. This sense of realism injected into one’s goals can thus be better reached when these seemingly insurmountable goals become broken down into smaller, more achievable acts. In this way, the impossible becomes possible, all without an unhealthy drive toward self-destruction.
Do something positive for yourself: This can also include self-care activities such as going on walks and doing some meditation. When there are moments of perfection-seeking behavior, try to press pause on the situation and see how you can de-stress.
There is no doubt that stress makes our goals appear less realistic and “worth it” than they truly are. Challenging oneself is thus much harder when stress makes everyday tasks a challenge to accomplish. With an emphasis on de-stressing and working to dissolve burnout as well as anxieties, one can sooner get back on track to reach greater heights.
Use a mantra: As silly as it sounds, using affirmations as mantra are beneficial. Affirmations such as “I am enough. My best is enough.” is very helpful to your mental health.
Mantras and other methods of internal self-motivation can not only serve as a means of maintaining confidence toward success, but they are absolutely pivotal when failure is eventually experienced. Positive affirmations breed positive outlooks on one’s failures and shortcomings, which thereby affirms self-worth and encourages moving forward with reasonable readjustments of expectations or stronger exercises of adaptive practices.
Interrupt that self-critical voice in your head: Reminding yourself that “It’s okay, if it isn’t perfect” is a great mantra to repeat when you want everything to be perfect. Replace it with positive statements.
While similar to strategy #3, this strategy emphasizes the importance of mantras to avoid the pitfalls of maladaptive perfectionism. In the aforementioned analysis, it is mentioned that it is quite easy for individuals to get swept away by negativity, all to the point where the individual becomes solely focused on criticisms and not so much on their own expectations (which have already reached extremely unreasonable and unrealistic levels). Managing excessive self-criticism is thus a priority worth taking.
REFERENCES
Burnam, A., Komarraju, M., Hamel, R., & Nadler, D. R. (2014). Do adaptive perfectionism and self-determined motivation reduce academic procrastination?. Learning and Individual Differences, 36, 165-172.
Bergland, Christopher. (2018). Is the Perfectionism Plague Taking a Psychological Toll? https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-athletes-way/201801/is-the-perfectionism-plague-taking-psychological-toll
Curran, T., & Hill, A. P. (2019). Perfectionism is increasing over time: A meta-analysis of birth cohort differences from 1989 to 2016. Psychological Bulletin, 145(4), 410–429
Kurapov, A. (n.d). Never Changing Maladaptive Perfectionism Will Eventually Destroy You.
Psychology4u. https://psychology4u.net/psychology/science-backed-information-on-maladaptive-perfectionism-you-need-to-know/
Psychology Today (n.d.). Perfectionism. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/perfectionism
Singh, A. (2021, October 12). Adaptive vs. Maladaptive Perfectionism: Knowing the Difference. Calmsage. https://www.calmsage.com/adaptive-vs-maladaptive-perfectionism/
The Family Institute at Northwestern University (2019, April 12). Pushing Back on Perfectionism: How to Be Happily Imperfect. https://counseling.northwestern.edu/blog/maladaptive-perfectionism-coping-strategies/
Travers, M. (2020, August 25). What Does It Mean to Be a Maladaptive Perfectionist?.
Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/social-instincts/202008/what-does-it-mEan-be-maladaptive-perfectionist
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